Poetry Journal - Blog Posts

Our love was wine drunk

At 3 am on the kitchen floor,

We made space for each other.

We were giggles illuminated

By the fairy lights in my room.

We were lights turned off

And windows pushed wide open;

We were a clear night sky,

We were so beautiful, so pure;

Two stars besides one another,

We were bright and free.

I wrote a poem

And you thought it was for you.

I wrote an eulogy

And you thought it was

For my funeral.

To be with someone

Who thinks of nothing

But the ending

When you both are still here

Is to say there already exist

Thousands of ends in their mind.

I just wish he has also imagined

One mellow future where

We're both here and we're both okay,

No one buries us and no one burns us.

I was not the broken thing anymore.

I cried and fought and fell

And scratched and clawed

My way back from hell.

I made an armour out of this body,

Grew my heart into a soldier,

Marched to once friendly lines

To cut off all ties

And fought you off

With all my might.

You weren't here anymore

And I grew myself a garden,

Planted my heart in its bosom;

Took the armour out to let it rust,

Felt the sunlight burn my thick skin,

And I almost could feel the years turn,

And could almost feel myself turn to dust.

There are things we do not talk about here.

Do not mention the lines that once

Ran along the length of your left hand,

Carved by you trying to play God

When you were barely a person//

Perhaps that was the point.

Half a year trying to make the scars disappear,

The other half spent convincing your own damn self not to.

Listen.

There are places in your head

You could disappear off to,

The ones which will make you so, so happy

And perhaps even a maniac,

But aren't maniacs just people

With enough conviction

To want to live in a world

That was their own mind's doing?

I am proud.

When the Earth tumulted and collapsed on me,

Trying to throw me off itself,

I held on with bare hands.

I dug my claws into the brown soil,

Trying to become one with the Mother,

Trying to grow myself some roots to stay.

I have already been here longer than I had imagined,

To have a place at all is magic in itself.

I have so much life left to grow roots out of.

1. I will see the World however I see fit. I will grow flowers where they've dropped bombs and deafened people// I AM HERE.

2. I am a little caught up right now.

The dark abyss was enticing me, it was calling and it took everything to not go meet her mid-way; Let her swallow me whole.

Red is angry and loud,

Red is a rebel teenager

Who wears eyeliner

On the wrong lid

And has too many piercings.

I never realised how small people could really be.

~ I believe we all have something called a ‘God’s gift’ or gifts. It is when something much more stronger than our own minds flows through our bodies to create things. When we show up, we also allow this divine energy to flow through us. ~

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~ notes from everyday ~

~ Today, I want to share something very dear to my heart, something that's become my Golden Mantra of sorts. I recently learnt and experienced that whenever you feel you're at a dead-end, lost or have 10% of clarity on a subject: . a) Pray: Take that 10% clarity and go ahead with it rather than wait for the remaining 90%. With that 10%, head to the Universe or to whichever divine energy you believe in and ask for help. Pray: about your worries, your hopes, your want for guidance and rest all of it on the Universe. Let it be there for you. . b) Act: Once you've teamed up with the Universe, pinpoint areas where you can start taking immediate action. What is the work you need to put in and in which areas? Prayer is one half of the Divine Teamwork, taking action is the next. It solidifies your hope and makes you feel actively responsible for your path. It makes you feel like a thriving part of it rather than a passive onlooker. . c) Surrender: Once you've acted in the best way you could, however minimal your actions might feel at times, surrender the outcome to the universe. Trust the divine plan and trust its timing. It is never wrong. Let go of your mind's need to control the result and trust the universe's splendid, ever-caring magic. . . P.S: Most often than not, we are the only ones in our way. Let's open our hearts to help (both divine and human), and let's learn to get out of our own way. 🌼 ~ . . ~ notes from everyday ~

~ Dear joy, thank you for quiet, persistent whisperings. ~ 🌼

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~ notes from everyday ~

~ Often, I say things because it gets me to belong in a circle of people I like. Often, those things are quite contrary to my own truths, to my values.  . Saying what you really want to say isn’t about being loud, but speaking clearly of what aligns with you.  . For. e.g. “Hey, I know it’s cool to talk dirty with your friends, but I do not like to. For me, sex is sacred and I don’t want to condition my mind to downplay it.” 

Or, “Hey, I know gossiping is fun, but it riles up a lot of negative emotions in me for someone, which I’d rather not feed.” . I am guessing we all talk of things we don’t whole-heartedly believe in sometimes, just to feel like we’re a part of people’s lives. But saying the things you really want to say is insanely powerful. It drops you back into your body, mind and heart thoroughly and when you say words which directly align with your energy, you feel beautifully grounded in who you really are. ~🌼

~ In the little joys, the daily joys, happiness awaits to hug us with arms open wide. ~ 

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~notesfromeveryday ~ 

~ Have you wondered how big an act of faith you perform every single night, as you fall asleep in the arms of darkness, trusting life to awaken you each morning, back to light? ~ @anvidoshi

~ May I live today as it comes.~ . May I surrender my expectations of how it "should be", with all my "what ifs" and "buts".✨ . May I be present to this day, with an open mind and a loving heart.✨

~ Sometimes courage is listening to that quiet, inner voice rather than the hundred loud ones surrounding you. ~ 🌼

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©anvidoshi