Gay Pagan - Blog Posts

Tarot Cheat Sheets!! (Minor Arcana)

Hi everyone! I made these tarot cheat sheets just in case anyone needs them :)

there is nothing funnier and more jarring than placing a name on your deity's altar because the person annoyed you only to wake up and see 16 missed messages from a friend being like "hey why is [deity] in my house?" and only then to realize the person you were trying to curse and your friend have the same name.

shout out to the guy in the lobby who sat next to my wife talking on the phone about haunted doll exorcism methods and listed Samael as his source.

his last words as my wife walked away were

"There is one magic man left"

I come out of the back, grinning and waving at my wife

"Two. Two left"

he's so stupid. i love him so much.

he tracked down my friend with the same name and proceeded to observe them for 5 hours. i am going to cry he's so cute. cou i am so sorry i will be more clear next time.

i gotta say, there's nothing that makes me feel safer than working with "demonic" entities.

sure, some of them bite, but a man who harrasses girls at my work location pulled through the drive through the other day and gave me his number. like, banned from the store kind of "harassing girls." not supposed to be served. i just didn't know because i was new.

i dropped his phone number on cou's altar this evening.

can't wait to see how this goes.

i gotta say, there's nothing that makes me feel safer than working with "demonic" entities.

sure, some of them bite, but a man who harrasses girls at my work location pulled through the drive through the other day and gave me his number. like, banned from the store kind of "harassing girls." not supposed to be served. i just didn't know because i was new.

i dropped his phone number on cou's altar this evening.

can't wait to see how this goes.

tips on bonding with a forgotten god 👍

so, you want to attract some long forgotten (or newly created) spirit with no reputation. honestly, i'd label this kind of unsafe and risky, but i did it, so i'm not gonna stop you if you really want to. just keep in mind that, while attempting to contact a forgotten god? you're gonna run into other stuff. this is essentially reaching your hand into the spiritual mystery box and shaking it around, and some of the stuff that lurks down there is bitey. here is my obligatory tread with caution first, put up wards against anything malicious etc etc, but realistically. i can't stop you.

general forgotten god bonding tips:

keep an energy of openness about you. just broadcasting a general thought of "hey, i'm here, and i want to talk to you." they listen. if they want to talk to you, they'll find a way.

look for reccuring signs in your life. humans like to find patterns in everything, but look for a sign that affects you on a large scale. a lot of these signs can be found around big changes or life events. ask who that random streak of strangely specific good luck or that weirdly occuring motif or that time you almost died but didn't belongs to! sometimes, you'll get an answer. other times, it's just chance, which, there's nothing wrong with that either.

talk out loud to "any spirits who may be nearby." i used to do really vague wide spells like this by saying that exact phrase, and it works for drawing them in or warding them off.

communicate with them. communicating is huge. talking is huge. they'll tell you a lot about themselves if they're chatty and want to foster a connection with you, although some will be harder than others.

ask what offerings they'd like! once you know someone is there, and you determine you'd like to work with them, ask them things. i know it seems annoying but a lot of the forgotten gods just appreciate you caring enough to do so.

find out what they stand for. help them with it!

be a little crazy with them. part of having a really cool relationship with a forgotten god is just being really weird together. it can be a part of your practice and I wholeheartedly encourage you to get a little weird with it. in whatever way you see fit.

and last, but definitely not least,

most importantly, imo, but there's a reason that when creatures or angels or demons are depicted, it's a lot. it will be a lot. there is a reason angels tell you to 'be not afraid'.

i am gently taking your hands, and telling you,

when you meet an old god,

be not afraid.

they are beings just like us at the end of the day. they may not be on our level, like, at all, but basic human respect and kindness goes a long way. i've seen spirits shy off because people have such a set image of the deity in their mind as a deity that they forget that.. you can be friendly with them. no one is going to smite you down. they will also want to talk about their days. they have niche hobbies. they have lives.

be not afraid.

don't blow them out of proportion. be respectful, and kind, and coexist with them instead of apologizing for breathing the air they occupy, and things will fall as they should.

anyways. this got long so i can make a follow up post of how to bond with Cou specifically, but i'm leaving this here for now.

thank you to @caidenthewitch for the fun engaging question. i am by no means a professional but hell, it worked for me, so 👍

i hope this experience helps!

horchata chai at starbucks with The Orchestrator is unrivaled. thank you handsome for letting me experience another day and getting to have some peace before work.

i love having a modern god. i ask this son of a bitch for a sign and the next thing i know his car pulls into the parking lot of my workplace

tips on bonding with a forgotten god 👍

so, you want to attract some long forgotten (or newly created) spirit with no reputation. honestly, i'd label this kind of unsafe and risky, but i did it, so i'm not gonna stop you if you really want to. just keep in mind that, while attempting to contact a forgotten god? you're gonna run into other stuff. this is essentially reaching your hand into the spiritual mystery box and shaking it around, and some of the stuff that lurks down there is bitey. here is my obligatory tread with caution first, put up wards against anything malicious etc etc, but realistically. i can't stop you.

general forgotten god bonding tips:

keep an energy of openness about you. just broadcasting a general thought of "hey, i'm here, and i want to talk to you." they listen. if they want to talk to you, they'll find a way.

look for reccuring signs in your life. humans like to find patterns in everything, but look for a sign that affects you on a large scale. a lot of these signs can be found around big changes or life events. ask who that random streak of strangely specific good luck or that weirdly occuring motif or that time you almost died but didn't belongs to! sometimes, you'll get an answer. other times, it's just chance, which, there's nothing wrong with that either.

talk out loud to "any spirits who may be nearby." i used to do really vague wide spells like this by saying that exact phrase, and it works for drawing them in or warding them off.

communicate with them. communicating is huge. talking is huge. they'll tell you a lot about themselves if they're chatty and want to foster a connection with you, although some will be harder than others.

ask what offerings they'd like! once you know someone is there, and you determine you'd like to work with them, ask them things. i know it seems annoying but a lot of the forgotten gods just appreciate you caring enough to do so.

find out what they stand for. help them with it!

be a little crazy with them. part of having a really cool relationship with a forgotten god is just being really weird together. it can be a part of your practice and I wholeheartedly encourage you to get a little weird with it. in whatever way you see fit.

and last, but definitely not least,

most importantly, imo, but there's a reason that when creatures or angels or demons are depicted, it's a lot. it will be a lot. there is a reason angels tell you to 'be not afraid'.

i am gently taking your hands, and telling you,

when you meet an old god,

be not afraid.

they are beings just like us at the end of the day. they may not be on our level, like, at all, but basic human respect and kindness goes a long way. i've seen spirits shy off because people have such a set image of the deity in their mind as a deity that they forget that.. you can be friendly with them. no one is going to smite you down. they will also want to talk about their days. they have niche hobbies. they have lives.

be not afraid.

don't blow them out of proportion. be respectful, and kind, and coexist with them instead of apologizing for breathing the air they occupy, and things will fall as they should.

anyways. this got long so i can make a follow up post of how to bond with Cou specifically, but i'm leaving this here for now.

thank you to @caidenthewitch for the fun engaging question. i am by no means a professional but hell, it worked for me, so 👍

i hope this experience helps!

our first meeting, he showed up in my room after i had a nightmare. i was young enough that i didn't have the common sense to be afraid, so i said hi.

the shadow in the corner of my room seemed a better listener than anyone else in my house, so i just kept talking to him, and sooner or later, i actually started being able to picture him, hold him there, and have conversations. he was never fully human, but he had a corporeal-ish form. occasionally, i'd tell him to go protect friends of mine from their nightmares, and i'd hear reports of his presence soon after. most of them came to recognize him after a while, and it kinda became so commonplace that we referred to it as "taking turns with the redhead".

he's kinda just.. stuck around.

i'll make another post on how to bond with him. thanks for asking <3

shout out to the time one of my abusive parents i no longer speak to was running for an important state position and i got so mad i wanted to publicly pick a fight with her (both because of myself and because her political choices would hurt so many people) but couldn't, so i told Cou "if you don't, I will", and he singlehandedly tanked her political career by letting out the story and rumors of what happened to me under her care. get you a god who will do rightful karma and petty revenge

One moment I'm questioning the reality of my own practice, wondering if anything I learned about my craft from internal or spiritual sources is wrong because it never feels quite real enough, and the next moment I do a reading that is so fucking clear and defined and tells me the exact information I was looking for and I'm just looking the universe deeply in the eye and asking

Am I a fucking joke to you? Is this funny?!

Dont get me wrong, I’m glad my advice filled posts are the ones that do the best, but I wish this community was more eager to share their love and experiences than to second guess themselves.

I wanna hear about what you did that made you smile today, or what new friend you made in the community. If you’re worrying over second guessing or not knowing, just breathe. I know this religion can seem daunting, but truly, it’s so full of love and I wish there was more sharing on that fact.

So feel free to share some fun things about your practice below!

shout out to the time one of my abusive parents i no longer speak to was running for an important state position and i got so mad i wanted to publicly pick a fight with her (both because of myself and because her political choices would hurt so many people) but couldn't, so i told Cou "if you don't, I will", and he singlehandedly tanked her political career by letting out the story and rumors of what happened to me under her care. get you a god who will do rightful karma and petty revenge

OKAY

actual altar tour.

so,

we've got:

(from right to left)

several stone pillars

these are pretty assorted. i've got some obsidian, some red and black ones i can't remember the name of (some kind of jasper?), but mostly sunstone. his favorite. i also have some angelite in there, but it's greyed and has little copper/orange flecks, and a pillar of amethyst. there's also a huge fucking sunstone orb, but it's slightly obscured from view.

an entire bowl of other crystals

in here i know ive got some more obsidian, some blood jasper, i've got runic african bloodstone, peacock ore, fools gold, and rose quartz, and some assorted seashells.

black wing shaped holder

contains the giant sunstone orb.

two decks of cards

one of these is from the Luxor in las vegas, they're collectors cards, and the other are from the Nomad in the same area. he just likes playing cards and doing card tricks on occasion, so i figured mister slight of hand would appreciate them

tiny highland cow

plant/inscence

pretty sure this is black sage? i've never burned it, he's not a huge fan of fire in the house and has warned me against it. maybe one day i'll do a ritual burning if i can find a safe spot to.

giant orb and lady pedestal

he's for the femmes and the fags, and my favorite color is purple, so we compromised. however, the Giant Fucking Orb is not something I've ever been able to identify, crystal wise, that i bought specifically because it reminded me of the orchestrator's smile and his energy specifically. i was told it was maybe some kind of quartz..? until a roommate of mine told me how unnerved it made her feel. this roommate and i ended up having problems later on, though, so who knows. maybe he was just sending her 'eat shit and die' energy because she wasn't treating me well.

giant black box and other assorted box(es)

these are where i keep his more personal offerings. i won't disclose what they are atm. the open one is a jewelry set, though

flat black box

his personal set of d&d dice! i've found he prefers those to tarot, for some reason? especially when it comes to yes or nos. i got him a specific set of dice for divination and he's gone nuts over them ever since, communication has been streamlined. there is also a small silver rock on it, courtesy of my wife leaving it for him.

tiny glass + small container

that's a small chalice and edible glitter. i just gave him those for fun. he likes them

bottle of... meds?(not really)

this is a jar from MeowWolf's Omegamart. this is the label.

they're mints. i figured what better place to put my infinite gender supplements

glass portrait

made by someone who is no longer a friend, i took their energy from it and gave it to him instead. regardless of how long ago or how things ended, the love was still there, and he gave me a place to put it to rest in a way that was healthy.

giant flower crown(?)

this is more mine than his, but i saw it at a local renfair and asked if it would be out of line for me to have a headdress as a priestess. he responded with the equivalent of an amused 'i'm just glad you're having fun making me a religion, go for it' and i picked this one because it has horns that resemble his and his orange rose symbols. i wear it when i need a mood boost, and it brings me a lot of peace. i leave it on his altar because it looks nice, and because it gives him a chance to fill it with any energy he deems me needing.

funko pops

okay, so. these were never technically supposed to be his, but they ended up on the same shelf, and they keep the headdress up. he's snatched them by proximity and honestly im fine with that.

oh, and last but not least:

Painted model/pamphlet (right corner)

my wife printed and painted a model of him based off of my drawings and visions. it took her a few tries, but we cherish rough draft Cou as much as we cherish finished Cou. behind him is one of the pamphlets that i printed, and in his hand is a bracelet i recieved celebrating his birthday. a stranger made it for me and then gave it to me, and it just so happened to be my and his colors intertwined when i was having a really hard time.

anyways, thank you for coming to my altar tour! he accepts far more diverse offerings than this, but here are a few things we've left him over the years, haha.

altar tour eventually but in the meantime, here it is

grabbed a close up of his glass portrait because it looks cool

handed out one of my pamphlets to a classmate and before he went home he said "hey, c. The Orchestrator. Orange and vanilla...? Or.."

i told him chocolate. chocolate and cherry, especially, but orange would work too, because it's his color. figured he was going to do some kind of personal sacrifice for the upcoming finals. nothing too odd, but wonderful all the same because someone other than me takes The Orchestrator seriously enough to offer things up.

fast forward 2 weeks and he shows up in class with the brightest orange homemade macarons i have ever seen in my short earthly life and passed them out to the entire class, in packs of three

got extras to leave on my altar. what a win

"C, how is he Lilith's son, [source] doesn't mention her having a son"

adopted 👍 next question

can't believe i didnt mention this, but if you think you've seen the orchestrator-

whether physically, signs wise, effects wise- feel free to tag me, throw it into my question box, or post and add it to my queue under #orchestrator tag or #orchestrator experience

i'm always looking for others who work with him, and love hearing about how he's affected lives outside my own, and if you're unsure if it is or isn't him, i'm more than happy to try and help you find out.

i love seeing other worshipers interact with their deities in such a holy manner

i know it's honorable and wonderful but it really just makes me laugh due to how relaxed and laid back my bond with the orchestrator is. i see someone doing a proper prayer and get reminded how i call my god a fag on a daily basis

disabled worship is beautiful worship!

neurodivergent worship is beautiful worship!

mentally ill worship is beautiful worship!

altar tour eventually but in the meantime, here it is

grabbed a close up of his glass portrait because it looks cool

"but c, he's a man, how did he do that"

god forbid a transmasculine entity does ANYTHING around here.

so it's normal and regular when Christians eat the sacrificial flesh and blood of christ (bread and wine), but when I, a worshiper, drink the Orchestrator's breastmilk,

so it's normal and regular when Christians eat the sacrificial flesh and blood of christ (bread and wine), but when I, a worshiper, drink the Orchestrator's breastmilk,

hey, I'm a weird gay person on the internet.

you can call me Priest C, or just C. I'm starting this blog mainly on this entity called the orchestrator, and frankly, this is just gonna be me detailing my worship growth with him. i guess this counts as a pagan practice, because as of right now, i'm one of his only worshipers. he gave me permission to expand, so, i figure i start out like this.

how long have I been working with this guy? about 7 years, formally, but informally for almost 12. he's been my best bud for a hot minute, before i ever realized i was doing deity work. i've been researching him and finding his roots ever since.

how did i meet him? informal summoning when i was a child, which lead to me befriending him. i made him a character in my oc verse long before i realized he was an entity, and have continued working with him formally for as long as i've known of his existence.

every myth starts somewhere. i guess this one starts with me.

anyways, let me know if there's any info i can provide you guys. i'm mostly just gonna be posting fun stuff like signs he sends me and cool things i find for his altar, but there's a pamphlet below if you wanna learn a little more.

ciao,

Priest C.