Jason: Croissants: Dropped

Bruce: Here's some advice

Dick: I didn't ask for any

Bruce: Too bad. I'm stuck here with my thoughts and you're the only one who talks to me

Carrie: I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.

Bruce: You're like 10 years old

Carrie: I MIGHT DIE AT 20!

Dick: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming

Barbara: Does anyone in this godforsaken group ever think before they speak

______________

Damian: I'm a reverse necromancer.

Carrie: Isn't that just killing people?

Damian: Ah, don’t sweat the details .

______________

Jason: Okay. I get it. You've had a really hard time lately, you're stressed out, seven people died-

Dick: Twelve, actually.

Jason: Not the point. Look, they're dead now and really whose fault is that?

Dick: Yours!

Jason: That's right: no one's.

_______________

Damian: Don’t worry, I have a few knives up my sleeve.

Steph: I think you mean cards.

Damian, pulling knives out of their sleeves: No, I do not.

________________

Store Worker: Would a Mr. Bruce Wayne please come to the front desk?

Bruce, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?

Store Worker: points to the batkids

Store Worker: I believe they belong to you?

Dick, simultaneously: We got lost :(

Bruce: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me-

__________________

Barbara: I can’t believe you live nearby, and you won’t let anyone crash at your place.

Luke: You people already know too much about me.

Tiffany: I know exactly three facts about you, and one of them is that you won’t let any of us crash at your place.

______________________

Tim: I’m kind of crushing on someone, but I’m worried about telling you who it is, because you’re not going to like it

Cullen: Just rip the bandage off.

Tim: It’s Kon.

Cullen: Put the bandage back on.

Stephanie: Stop buying plastic skeletons for Halloween! It's terrible for the environment!

Jason: Yeah! Locally sourced, all natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly!

Congratulations you now get to simp

Dick: Let’s watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Wally: Okay.

Dick: And make out during the scary parts.

Wally: Th-

Wally: The scary parts.

Wally: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Jon: I made this friendship bracelet for you.

Damian: You know, I’m not really a jewelry person.

Jon: You don’t have to wear…

Damian: No, I’m gonna wear it forever. Back off.

Harper: If you were to vacuum up jello through a metal tube, well I think that’d be a neat noise

Bette: I beg to differ

Harper: Then Beg

Barbara: I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Someone asked me what the Spanish word for "tortilla" was once, and now I dream of kissing them under the moonlight.

Dick: Babs what kind of animal is the Pink Panther?

Barbara , already taking off their clothes: God, Dick, you’re so fucking stupid.

Harper, struggling to keep upright in their 1 inch heels: Yeah, I-I don’t really think heels are for me

Kate, pointing at them and walking flawlessly in sparkly golden 6 inch heels: WEAK.